The affliction, the label placed upon the suffering, gives us an excuse to sit and talk, to start a conversation in which change and transformation could occur. If it's early, for instance, in the course of metabolic syndrome, we could transform our lifestyle and loose the illness. If it's late, perhaps our goal is comfort and meaning, especially after the renal failure and blindness have occurred. In my experience, asthma also always responds to dialogue; less so, COPD. Cancer is its own unique set of complications. We can also develop strategies for interfacing with the remainder of the medical system. Recently a patient of mine had her second bypass surgery in 11 years. I knew it was coming because I could not get at the stories that kept her from controlling her blood glucose adequately. After it happened, however, the young specialists had a bevy of protocols on which to place her. If she took all their recommended medications, she would have been taking 12 different drugs each day, many of which interacted and all of which had side effects. We generated a plan of demanding end points from the specialists. What was the goal? Rather than take everything, she wanted to take only those medications which would clearly advance her capacity to walk extended distances and up and down stairs without shortness of breath. She proposed to the specialists to assess each drug individually for its contribution (or lack thereof) to her walking and climbing capacity. If it didn't make a difference, probably it was unnecessary, even though recommended by protocol. This was a new story for the specialists (but a common one to geriatricians who often joke about killing the patient to cure the illness). I was able to help this patient to negotiate with her specialists in a way in which she got what she wanted and they learned to respect her. We are still working to find meaning in the heart disease through co-authoring a story called "adventures of the heart". It is a work in progress but one that has already comforted her despite her limitations.
Thus, illness or other afflictions present opportunities for meaning-making, through dialogue with the illness, through allowing it to speak and be heard, through querying it, through negotiating with it, through transcending it, through the myriad of relational opportunities available. Sometimes this allows the illness to calm itself, to depart, and sometimes it doesn't. Always the opportunity exists, however, to make more meaning than existed previously. This is the invitation that every affliction makes -- to co-create meaning and value.
This weekend, February 3-5, I will be in Honolulu doing a narrative workshop. On the weekend of March 9th, I will be in Woodstock, NY for a narrative hypnosis workshop. Contact me at Email address removed for details or visit my facebook site or visit my website at http://www.mehl-madrona.com.
